The other day I did calls for like four hours because Sister Ng has been pretty sick and at first it was the worst because calls are pretty hard. But then I just started talking to people and asking them about their lives and I couldn't really understand them but it was ok and there was this guy outside out apartment singing terrible karaoke and there I was talking to about a thousand chinese people on the phone and it was the funniest situation I have ever been in. This whole experience is really pushing me and I'm realizing I want the results but not always the uncomfortable parts.
Yesterday at church I was feeling so discouraged because I just want to communicate with people but I can't fully understand them when I try to and they can't understand me and I just feel like I sit there feeling so awkard and no one can tell and it is the worst. And then our district leader who is from Korea went up and bore his testimony. He talked about how hard being a missionary is and then he looked at me and said dai ji muih(me) and song jeung louh (elder stober) are new missionaries and they have a lot of difficulties no one can see. I felt like for the first time someone finally got it. I knew that god was really hearing my prayers for them to just get it and so he sent little korean Elder Kim to go tell them. It was a cool experience. Another tender mercy on a list of many.
When I was in first grade I got sick at school so the school called my Mom and had her pick me up. For some reason (which isn't surprising because we are the Terry's) my Mom didn't have a car at the time and so she walked to the school and when she got there she put me on her back and gave me a piggy back ride all the way home. Our house on Montana Avenue was up at the top of the hill from the school and she carried me the whole way.
I've been thinking about this day a lot. I feel like it is happening again. I feel like Im struggling to understand language and culture so much I cant really do anything on my own yet and so I had to call home. And the person this time who came to pick me up without a car was my Savior. Every morning when I wake up I climb up on His back and He carries me. It's sooooooo hot outside and our house is uphill but he doesn't complain, He doesn't even seem to mind. He is just carrying me home. My heart is full of gratitude for this Jesus who never tires of succoring us. My faith is not perfect and I'm ashamed to admit the way I so often doubt Him and ask Him if He knows what we are even doing. But it doesn't matter. I think that if I was carrying my daughter on my own back up a steep hill and she was telling me I wasn't doing enough I would put her down and say "Okay, do it yourself." But our Jesus does not do that, and wow I am so thankful for that. He hears me out and all the while never stops walking, never puts me down, never makes me do it all on my own.
I love Him with all my heart and if there is something He is teaching me while on his stable back it is that He love me too. He loves all of His children, maybe especially the ones in Hong Kong.
I love you guys! Have a great week.
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